The main memories I have of my childhood are 'violence & fear'. My father was very abusive towards my mother, brother and sisters, so I spent much of my life hiding from drunks, anger and abuse. I have 7 other siblings, so during the early years I would pick tomatoes and potatoes from local fields just to have something to eat. School days were a nightmare because my clothes were dirty and I was such a mess - but at least I got a hot meal and a place to escape the abuse and neglect.

I don't know how I survived those early years, I really don't, but I was yet to fall further into despair as my fear turned to anger, resentment and hatred at what my life had become - at what I had become!

With hindsight , I realise I would always have become alcoholic - regardless of my childhood - because this is how my personality is inclined, the mental twist that obsesses over 'something'. Despite an awful introduction into 'life', I didn't become alcoholic by being abused, but just by 'being!'